For most people, a bet on the big game or a night at the casino is just entertainment. But for some, gambling slowly shifts from something fun to something that feels hard to control. It can happen quietly, one app, one parlay or one "just this once" at a time. If you've started to wonder about your own betting, or you're worried about someone you love, this guide walks through the signs many people notice, how gambling ties in with stress and mood, and how counselling can help.
This post is general information only. It isn't a screening tool, a diagnosis, or financial or legal advice.
When betting stops being just for fun
MedlinePlus, from the U.S. National Library of Medicine, puts it simply: many people enjoy gambling, and most people who gamble don't have a problem, but some lose control of their gambling.
That loss of control often creeps in. Betting starts to feel less like fun and more like pressure. You might bet to fix a bad week, to win back what you lost or to feel something when life feels flat. You might notice that the stakes keep going up, or that you think about the next bet more than you'd like.
None of this means you're a bad person. Gambling problems can affect anyone, and noticing the signs is a strong first step.
Why it can feel easier to slip now in Ontario
Gambling has become more visible and more accessible in recent years. A few facts help explain why:
According to the Alcohol and Gaming Commission of Ontario (AGCO), Bill C-218, the Safe and Regulated Sports Betting Act, amended Canada's Criminal Code to legalize single-event sports betting and came into force on August 27, 2021.
iGaming Ontario launched Ontario's new regulated market for internet gaming on April 4, 2022.
In practical terms, this means many people can now place a bet on a single game from their phone, at any hour. Betting ads have become a familiar part of watching sports. For someone who's vulnerable, that easy access can make it harder to step back.
Signs you may have a gambling problem
There's no single sign that means you have a gambling problem, and only a qualified professional can make a diagnosis. MedlinePlus lists signs of problem gambling that include always thinking about gambling, lying about gambling, spending work or family time gambling, feeling bad after you gamble but not quitting, and gambling with money you need for other things.
The MedlinePlus medical encyclopedia, summarizing how the American Psychiatric Association describes gambling disorder, also lists signs such as:
Gambling larger amounts of money to try to make back past losses, often called chasing losses.
Needing to gamble larger amounts of money to feel excitement.
Feeling restless or irritable when trying to cut back or quit.
Gambling to escape problems or feelings of sadness or anxiety.
Making many unsuccessful attempts to cut back or quit.
Needing to borrow money because of gambling losses.
Losing a job, relationship, education or career opportunity because of gambling.
This isn't a checklist to score. If several of these feel familiar, it's worth talking to someone.
Signs a partner or family member may notice
People who gamble often hide it, so loved ones may notice the effects before they hear about the betting itself. The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) describes behavioural, emotional, financial and health signs that families may see. Some examples include:
Conflicts over money, or money that goes missing from a bank account or wallet.
Frequently borrowing money or asking for advances.
Alternating between being broke and flashing money.
Mood swings and sudden outbursts of anger.
Withdrawing from family and friends, or seeming far away or anxious.
Being gone for long, unexplained periods of time.
Missing family events or ignoring work, school or family tasks.
You might also notice someone glued to scores, tense during games or unusually secretive about their phone. On their own, these don't prove anything. Together, and over time, they may be worth a gentle conversation.
Gambling, mood and money stress
Gambling problems rarely exist in a vacuum. MedlinePlus notes that people may gamble to escape problems or feelings of sadness or anxiety, and that stressful situations can worsen gambling problems.
This can create a cycle. Stress or low mood leads to betting for relief. Losses bring more stress, shame and money worries. Those feelings lead to more betting to fix things. Over time, the cycle can affect sleep, relationships, work and self-esteem.
If money worries are weighing on you, our post on financial stress and mental health explores how the two connect. And if low mood is part of the picture, it's important to talk about that too.
What counselling can help with
Counselling offers a private, non-judgmental place to look at what's happening and what you want to change. At our clinic, we approach addiction counselling on two levels: helping you identify triggers, manage overwhelming feelings and take care of yourself in more sustainable ways, and helping you understand and heal what may sit underneath the behaviour.
In counselling for gambling, that might include:
Noticing the situations, feelings and thoughts that lead to betting.
Building ways to handle urges and stress.
Exploring what gambling has been doing for you, such as offering escape or excitement.
Working through guilt, shame and low mood.
Rebuilding honesty and trust with a partner, sometimes through couples counselling.
You can meet with a therapist in person at one of our offices or online from home, whichever feels more comfortable.
What change can look like
Change rarely happens all at once, and setbacks don't mean failure. For many people, the first shift is simply being honest, with themselves and then with someone they trust. From there, change might look like:
Talking openly about what's been happening, instead of carrying it alone.
Understanding the moments when urges are strongest, such as late at night, after a stressful day or during big games.
Finding other ways to unwind, connect or feel excitement.
Repairing relationships slowly, with patience on both sides.
Feeling less shame and more hope about the future.
Your goals are your own. A counsellor can help you decide what you want and work toward it at a pace that feels manageable.
If you are worried about someone you love
It's hard to watch someone you care about struggle, especially when it affects your finances and your trust. A few ideas:
Choose a calm moment. Avoid raising it right after a loss or in the middle of a game.
Speak from your experience. "I've noticed money has been tight and I'm worried" lands better than accusations.
Expect some defensiveness. Shame often shows up as denial or anger at first.
Look after your own stability. It's reasonable to think about boundaries around shared money. A counsellor can help you work out what feels right for your situation.
Get support for yourself. You don't have to wait for your loved one to be ready.
Our guide on how to help someone with addiction has more ideas for families.
Cost and support
Here's what to know about cost:
Sessions with our therapists range from $130 to $200, and couples sessions range from $170 to $200, depending on the clinician.
Depending on your plan, insurance may cover some or all of the cost. Coverage varies, so it's worth checking your plan.
We direct bill many insurers, even for sessions with a registered psychotherapist (qualifying).
If you or someone you love is having thoughts of suicide, call or text 9-8-8 any time, day or night. If anyone is in immediate danger, call 911.
Your first step
Book a free 15-minute consultation with our admin team. Whether you're worried about your own gambling or someone else's, they can answer your questions and help you find a therapist, in person or online.
Change is possible, and you don't have to figure it out alone.