The lights go up, the music starts and everyone seems excited. But you feel further away from it all, as if you're watching through a window. Holiday depression is a common way to describe low mood that gets heavier during the holiday season. If that's you, you're not doing the holidays wrong, and there are gentle ways to get through them.
This post is general information, not medical advice or a diagnosis.
What is holiday depression?
"Holiday depression" is an everyday phrase, not a diagnosis. People use it to describe feeling sad, flat or hopeless around the holidays. For some, it is a short dip often called the holiday blues. For others, the season makes existing depression feel worse.
The holidays can bring a lot at once: high hopes, family time, memories, money pressure and shorter days. Feeling low in the middle of all that is more common than the cheerful ads suggest.
Holiday blues vs depression
The holiday blues tend to be lighter and shorter. You might feel tired, teary or let down, but you can still enjoy some things, and the feeling eases once the season passes.
Depression is more than a low mood. CAMH explains that someone may have depression if they have symptoms most days, for most of the day, for more than two weeks, and the symptoms affect how they function at work, at school or in relationships (see Sources).
A few things can help you tell them apart:
How long it lasts. The blues come and go. Depression sticks around for weeks.
How much it affects your life. Depression can make it hard to work, sleep, eat or care for yourself.
Whether joy is still possible. With the blues, good moments still break through. With depression, things you used to love may feel empty.
Only a qualified professional can tell you whether what you're feeling is depression.
Why the holidays can make low mood worse
There is rarely one reason. Some common ones include:
Pressure to feel happy. When everyone around you seems joyful, feeling low can bring guilt and shame on top of sadness.
Comparison. Photos of perfect gatherings can make your own life feel lacking.
Old family roles. Going home can pull you back into patterns and feelings you thought you'd left behind.
Missing someone. An empty chair can make grief feel fresh again.
Money strain. Gifts, travel and events can add up.
Shorter days. Less daylight can affect energy and mood for some people.
Broken routines. Late nights, rich food and skipped exercise can leave you drained.
Alcohol. Drinking is often part of holiday events, and it can make low mood worse.
If worry and to-do lists are the bigger problem for you, our post on Christmas anxiety looks at holiday stress. If being alone is what hurts most, our post on feeling lonely at Christmas may help.
Holiday blues vs seasonal depression
Seasonal depression is a different pattern. The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) explains that seasonal affective disorder is a type of depression that comes back with the seasons. In most cases, symptoms start in the late fall or early winter and ease in the spring and summer (see Sources).
Holiday blues are tied to the season's events and pressures. Seasonal depression is tied to the time of year itself. Both deserve care.
Signs your holiday low may be more than the blues
It may be more than the blues if you notice:
Feeling sad, empty or irritable most of the day, most days
Losing interest in things you usually enjoy
Sleeping much more or much less than usual
Changes in appetite
Trouble concentrating
Feeling hopeless or worthless
Pulling away from people
Thoughts that life is not worth living
Some people also notice a dip after the holidays, once the lights come down and January begins. That counts, too.
If you are thinking about suicide or hurting yourself, call or text 9-8-8 now. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 911.
How to cope with depression during the holidays
When your energy is low, big plans can feel impossible. Try a few small, low-effort steps instead:
Lower the bar. You don't need to do every event, tradition or recipe. Pick what matters most and let the rest go.
Keep sleep and meals steady. Regular bedtimes and simple meals can help your mood stay more even.
Plan one small connection a day. A text, a short call or a walk with someone counts.
Give yourself permission to leave early. You can go to a gathering for an hour and head home.
Watch the alcohol. If drinking is part of the season, our post on staying sober during the holidays has ideas.
Name one person you can be honest with. Let at least one person know how you are really doing.
Make room for grief. If you are missing someone, it is okay to mark it in your own way, like lighting a candle or sharing a memory.
It can also help to plan ahead for the hardest days, like a big family dinner or a date that brings back memories. Decide how long you'll stay, who you can step outside with and what you'll do afterward to rest.
Be kind to yourself if some days are harder than others. Coping is not about feeling cheerful. It is about getting through with care.
If you are supporting someone who is low this season
If someone you love seems down, you don't need to fix it. Some ideas:
Check in gently. "I've noticed you seem quieter. How are you really doing?"
Listen more than you advise. Let them share without trying to cheer them up right away.
Invite without pressure. "We'd love to have you, and it's okay if you need to leave early."
Keep in touch after the holidays. Low mood doesn't always end on January 1.
If they talk about suicide or you are worried about their safety, call 911 if they are in immediate danger. They can also call or text 9-8-8 any time.
How counselling can help
If the season feels heavy, you don't have to wait until January to get support. A therapist can help you understand what is driving your low mood, work through grief or family stress and find small ways to cope. Counselling for depression offers a calm space to talk, without pressure to feel merry.
We offer individual counselling at our Kitchener-Waterloo, Cambridge and Ottawa offices and online across Ontario.
Common questions about holiday depression
Why do I get depressed during the holidays? Pressure to feel happy, comparison, family stress, grief, money worries, shorter days and broken routines can all play a part.
Is holiday depression real? It is not a diagnosis, but the low mood people feel is real. For some, the season makes existing depression worse.
What is the difference between holiday blues and depression? The blues are usually lighter and pass with the season. Depression lasts longer and affects daily life.
How do you cope with depression during the holidays? Keep plans small and simple. Protect your sleep and meals, plan one small connection each day, watch the alcohol and let at least one person know how you are really doing.
Is it okay to skip holiday events? Yes. You can say no, go for a short time or plan a quieter day that feels better for you.
Cost, billing and your first step
Sessions with our therapists range from $130 to $200, depending on the clinician.
We accept Health Spending Accounts (HSAs).
We can direct bill many insurers. Coverage depends on your plan, so check with your insurer before you start.
Book a free 15-minute consultation with our admin team. If the season feels heavy, you don't have to wait until January.
If you're in crisis: if you or someone you love is in immediate danger, call 911. If you're thinking about suicide, call or text 9-8-8 any time, day or night.
Last reviewed: October 2026
Sources
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH). "Depression." https://www.camh.ca/en/health-info/mental-illness-and-addiction-index/depression
National Institute of Mental Health. "Seasonal Affective Disorder." https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/seasonal-affective-disorder