Some feelings arrive like a wave. One moment you're fine, and the next you're overwhelmed by anger, panic or hurt, and you say or do things you later regret. If that sounds familiar, you may have come across DBT. This guide explains what DBT looks like with us in Ottawa, who it can help, the four skill areas it teaches and how individual sessions work, downtown or online.
This post is general information, not a diagnosis or a treatment plan.
Who DBT can help
DBT, short for dialectical behaviour therapy, was developed by psychologist Marsha Linehan in the late 1980s. It was designed for people whose emotions feel bigger, faster and harder to settle than other people's. You might relate if you:
Feel emotions intensely. Small things can trigger strong reactions that take a long time to fade.
Have stormy relationships. Conflict, fear of being left or swinging between closeness and distance.
Act on urges. Doing things in the heat of the moment, like lashing out, spending or bingeing, to make a feeling stop.
Feel empty or unsure of yourself. Not knowing who you are or what you want from one day to the next.
Struggle with self-harm or suicidal thoughts. DBT was built with these struggles in mind, and safety is always a priority.
You don't need a diagnosis to benefit from DBT skills. Many people who look for dialectical behaviour therapy, Ottawa residents included, simply want better ways to handle strong emotions. If you've been searching for DBT therapy, Ottawa is one of four cities where we offer individual DBT-informed sessions, along with online sessions across Ontario.
What DBT is, in plain words
The word "dialectical" means holding two ideas that seem opposite at the same time. In DBT, the main pair is acceptance and change. You're doing the best you can right now, and you can also learn new ways to cope.
DBT grew out of cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) and blends it with mindfulness. It's practical and skills-based, but it also puts a lot of weight on validation, which means recognizing that your feelings make sense given your history and situation. Our page on dialectical behaviour therapy explains the approach in more detail.
The four skill areas
DBT teaches skills in four main areas:
Mindfulness. Paying attention to the present moment without judging it. This is the foundation of the other skills.
Distress tolerance. Getting through painful moments and situations you can't change right now without making them worse.
Emotion regulation. Understanding and naming your feelings, lowering their intensity and making your inner world less of a roller coaster. Many people search for DBT for emotional regulation, Ottawa residents included, for exactly this reason.
Interpersonal effectiveness. Asking for what you need, saying no and setting boundaries while keeping relationships and self-respect intact.
You'll likely practise skills from all four areas, with more focus on whichever ones fit your goals.
What individual DBT-informed sessions look like
With us, DBT is offered as individual DBT-informed therapy. That means you meet one-on-one with a therapist who uses DBT skills and ideas, tailored to you. We don't run DBT skills groups, phone coaching or a full DBT program with a consultation team.
A typical course might include:
Getting clear on goals. What do you want to change? Fewer blow-ups, calmer mornings, steadier relationships?
Understanding your patterns. Looking at what happens before, during and after hard moments, so you can spot where a new skill could help.
Learning and practising skills. Your therapist teaches a skill in session, and you try it during the week.
Reviewing what happened. Next session, you look at what worked, what didn't and what to try next, without blame.
Progress often looks like small shifts at first: pausing a few seconds longer before reacting, or bouncing back faster after an argument. Those small shifts build on each other.
Finding a DBT therapist in Ottawa
DBT is one of several approaches our therapists use. At least one therapist on our Ottawa team lists DBT among their approaches, and you can also work with therapists across Ontario online.
When you look for a DBT therapist Ottawa residents can see in person or online, it helps to ask:
How do you use DBT skills in individual sessions?
Which skill areas do you think would help me most?
What other approaches do you use alongside DBT?
Our admin team can help match you with someone who fits what you're looking for.
DBT for teens
Teens often feel emotions with great intensity, and DBT skills can be a good fit for some of them. In Ottawa, we offer individual therapy for children 6 and up, teens and adults. If you're a parent wondering whether DBT-informed sessions could help your teen, mention it when you book, and our admin team can talk through options. Parents may be involved in some sessions or check-ins, depending on your teen's needs and what they're comfortable with.
Our post on teen therapy in Ottawa explains how individual sessions for teens work.
What a skill can look like in real life
DBT skills are meant to be used in ordinary, messy moments, not just in a therapist's office. Here's an example of how a few skills might come together.
Say you get a curt text from a friend and feel a rush of hurt and anger. Your first urge is to fire back something sharp. Instead, you notice the urge and name the feeling: "I'm hurt, and I'm angry." That's mindfulness. You step away from the phone, splash cold water on your face and take a few slow breaths until the wave passes a little. That's distress tolerance. Then you check the facts. Is it possible your friend is just busy? That's emotion regulation. Finally, you reply calmly and ask what's going on. That's interpersonal effectiveness.
It won't always go this smoothly, especially at first. The point isn't perfection. It's having more options than your first urge, more of the time.
DBT, CBT or something else?
DBT is especially helpful when emotions feel overwhelming and relationships feel chaotic. It isn't the best fit for everything. For example, it isn't designed to process trauma directly the way approaches like EMDR do, and for simpler concerns, CBT may get results more quickly. Many of our therapists blend approaches, so your therapist can suggest what fits best and adjust along the way.
What to expect from DBT Ottawa sessions over time
There's no fixed number of sessions. Some people come for a focused stretch to learn specific skills. Others stay longer, especially when they're working on long-standing patterns. Your therapist will check in with you regularly about progress and whether the plan still makes sense.
Downtown Ottawa or online
Our Ottawa office is at 1 Rideau Street, 7th Floor, Ottawa, ON K1N 8S7, inside the Fairmont Château Laurier. You can reach the office at (613) 691-1006.
If coming downtown is hard, online sessions are available anywhere in Ontario on a secure, encrypted video platform. Many people find it easier to practise skills from home. We also offer sessions in person in Waterloo, Kitchener and Cambridge.
Cost and billing
Here's what to know about cost:
Sessions with our therapists range from $130 to $200, depending on the clinician.
Depending on your plan, insurance may cover some or all of the cost. Coverage varies, so it's worth checking your plan.
We accept Health Spending Accounts (HSAs).
We can direct bill many insurers, including for sessions with a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying). Desjardins is the exception: through TELUS eClaims, we can direct bill Desjardins for sessions with an RSW, RP or psychologist, but not for an RP (Qualifying).
Your first step
Book a free 15-minute consultation with our admin team. Let them know you're interested in DBT skills and whether you'd prefer our downtown office or online sessions.
If you're in crisis: call 911 if you or someone else is in immediate danger. If you're having thoughts of suicide, call or text 9-8-8 any time, day or night. You can find more options on our crisis lines page.
Strong emotions aren't a flaw. With the right skills and support, they can become easier to ride out.